I have come to the conclusion that nothing stings and tastes as bitter as does a betrayal within your family; especially, when this betrayal happens to you. I feel kind of like my family has abandoned me.

They even went so far as to say, that if they saw me sitting on a street corner hungry and homeless, they would not stop, they would pass me by. Being the person that I am and having the care and dedication, love, and honor for family as I do, it hurt me a great deal hearing this come from my very own sister’s mouth.

Soon, everyone else jumped on board and there I stood, wide eyed verging tears and depleted of faith; faith in what family truly meant, faith in anything divine or magical, and regretful. I regretted ever trying to get to know my biological family. I tried to talk myself into forgiveness. It truly is the only way to move forward in life. I am struggling with that.

One day, I am sure I will come to terms with things. I always do. I find it extremely difficult to do so now though. So, now that my very own sister has kicked my son and I out of our house, we are on the road again.

This travel brings us to the mountains of Georgia, where we will adapt and overcome. My family has turned their backs on me and despite their blindness and self centered ways I love them. Is that naive of me? No, it is what I am supposed to do. I will not blame myself this time. I will not say I am sorry and not know why.

I will simply walk away and never look back.

It appears they have no problems judging me, turning their cheeks to me, and offer these superficial gestures, when they only offer them to turn around and judge me yet again. Fork tongues. I am so angry inside. I feel so stupid. I was used up and tossed out, with no more thought than that toward an empty milk container after the contents have been consumed.

I really thought I was blessed to have been given the opportunity to get to know my family. But they are more strangers to me than the people that adopted me. It shows in their eyes that they were fine before me and they will continue to be long after. I am very disappointed.